The Rejected Luna’s Prince By Aurora Archer
Chapter 67 – Finals
(Nolan)
Sitting at my desk I grasped a large glass of whiskey in my hands. Everything was muddled. I wanted to slip into the comfort of the abyss.
I didn’t want to think, didn’t want to have to think anymore.
I’m pretty sure that Jack and Isaac came by, Jack probably spewing some moral b.ullshit, I could still see his disappointed and condescending face. I was his Alpha for f*uc*ks sake, how dare he?
My dad came in and took one look at me and left this afternoon, or maybe this morning. Possibly yesterday.
I was hoping everything would right itself, by some miracle everything just fall back into place while I was gone deep within myself. I needed someone else to figure it out, to step up. I couldn’t do it right now. I had so much on my plate to deal with it, I had my own internal problems.
I took a long sip of the burning liquid that tasted like nothing now.
I squeezed the glass, and it shattered in my hand, but I didn’t feel that pain. It was nothing compared to the pain that rippled through me in burning waves.
Was this the mate bond snapping?
I only felt something similar to this before when Willa accepted my rejection. I held it together only until she walked out of my office, pain, and sadness etched on her beautiful face. Thankfully, I had Camilla to help me through the pain, but now, I had no one.
Was Camilla dead? Did they k.ill her already?
I clutched at my heart, trying to claw away the pain. It was bigger than me, something undid me, changed completely. Something was ripped away from me for good.
I screamed wordlessly, pain rippling through me, suffocating me.
I knew that it wasn’t Camilla, something like what we had wasn’t this powerful.
No, something fated destined was shifting, it’s lingering remanents leaving me forever.
I was cold, dark, helpless.
All was lost.
(Willa)
The late morning sun stretched through the cracks in the curtains bathing me in buttery warmth. I moved back a bit from Caspien’s tight embrace and looked up at him still sleeping.
I dragged my finger lightly over his familiar beautiful face. His dark brows, straight nose, perfect lips. He looked so peaceful, so unaffected by his everyday troubles when he was sleeping.
His eyes fluttered open pinning me with his icy stare.
His hand nestled on my cheek and he rubbed his thumb across it, “My Luna,” He said in awe before dipping low and placing a hard kiss on my lips.
“How are you this morning, love?” He asked, his voice still grumbly with sleep.
“Sore,” I admitted, even the small movements I did made my body ache.
A wide smile plastered on his face as he brushed a loose strand of hair behind my ear, “Good.”
I settled into his warm touch and let my eyes close, breathing in his scent and basking in the feel of him.
I was safe and secure in our apartment, where our parents had places a few floors below, and my son was loved and well taken care of.
Our son.
I didn’t think about what was next, I didn’t obsess over what was to come for once. I just let this perfect moment be.
Are you up? We have to study
What? – Hissed back at Cali annoyed at her ruining this moment with reality
Get your booty down here, lover girl
I sighed and peeled myself away from Caspien explaining that Cali needed me. He reluctantly let me go running his hands down his face.
“I should get back to life too,” He sat up and stretched, his muscles rippled and stretched. His motion almost made me crawl back into bed with him.
He raised an eyebrow at me, a question.
“I can’t.” I shook my head bit my lip and dashed to the bathroom to take a cold shower before my l*us*t could overcome the sliver of logic that I had knowing Cali needed something.
If I slipped back into bed we wouldn’t leave. All day. And unfortunately, reality did call, there was a lot of s*hi*t we had to figure out still regarding Alpha Jasper’s pack and the looming Camilla problem.
I slipped under the cool water and squeezed shampoo into my hands, waiting for the water to help me make sense of things.
I tried to wrap my mind around her actions and what to do with her. I didn’t understand her hatred of me, it seemed to only stem because of her love for Nolan. But she went out of her way to try to harm my mate, her Prince, and that seemed like a personal attack against me.
After I wrapped myself in a fluffy towel and started to air-dry my hair I still had no further insight on how to deal with her in a way that was rational and fair.
End her, she might still pose a threat – Iris growled
She had a point, who was to say that if we let her go she wouldn’t retaliate again? I wouldn’t put it past her to be even angrier that she was imprisoned instead of seeing it as a huge favor we were doing.
But what would happen to her son? My stomach clenched thinking about what Emmett would do without me.
Griffen was right, there was no easy choice and I didn’t think I could keep emotion out of it. I tried to remove anger but now I just felt so guilty for what I could take away from her son.
Caspien’s arms wrapped around me and I gently pulled the brush from my hand setting it by the mirror.
“What’s wrong?” He murmured into my shoulder and I leaned back into him.
“I’m just not sure what to do with Camilla. No matter what I choose I’m terrified that there will be repercussions,” I let out a long breath, “What if we let Camilla go and she still holds that anger?” I met his eyes in the mirror, “What if we sentence her to death or to live her life in a cell, and then Nolan comes after us?”
I shook my head and closed my eyes, a familiar sinking feeling settled over me. I didn’t want to live on edge, I didn’t want to have anything looming over me.
“Don’t worry about that,” Caspien kissed my shoulder, “Don’t think about the potential consequences, we don’t have control over everyone else and you’ll drive yourself crazy if you try to map our every possible reaction.”
He was right, of course, he was right. He had years of training, years of experience, he was quite literally bred for this role.
“We will deal with any potential consequences that may come our way. No matter what you choose, what we choose there will be something that arises from it, good or bad. Usually both,” I didn’t look away from his gaze in the mirror.
“So leave consequences out of it, or try to. The only factor in what you think is the right decision.”
“How do you know?” My voice was small.
“You never do, not fully,” He shook his head barely, “It’s something you have to live with.”
“You sound like Griffen,” I smiled at him, and he returned it.
“I knew I chose a good Beta,” He kissed my neck and I tried to keep my logic despite the butterflies erupting at his touch, “But the Moon Goddess chose you as Luna. Twice,” He raised an eyebrow, “You were meant to be in a leadership role, trust your instincts, if something feels wrong, really wrong, there’s usually a reason for that.”
I tried to wrap my mind around that.
At the moment, everything felt like the wrong choice, but there was something that was gnawing at me, eating away more than anything else. I had time though to revisit it and see if it was my instincts instead of some misplaced anxiety.
“Thanks, that was honestly really helpful.”
“Don’t act so surprised,” He stood to his full height behind me before turning me around and wrapping me in his arms again, “That’s what I’m here for, My Luna,” He murmured into my hair.
The sound of that coming from his lips sent a bolt of tingles through me. Through it all, even if it was only a few months, we made it this far and we would make it much further.
Together.
_________
Cali was waiting her arms crossed looking me up and down.
“You look fresh,” I noted.
“Sit,” She motioned to Caspien’s dining table, my dining table now.
I looked over the array of bright notecards and piles of books, neatly stacked blank pages and pens.
“What is this?” I asked her, not taking a seat yet.
“We have finals. Final finals.” She said, her hazel gaze piercing.
“Cali I-”
“Sit,” She commanded and I pulled out the chair across from her.
I vaguely remembered turning in some papers and doing online quizzes in between all the b.ullshit. This past week I didn’t even open a book. It was something I did to make me try to feel normal when Emmett was sick. I would sit next to him and go through notes and textbooks and re-watch recorded cla*s*ses, but I wasn’t fully there.
There has been so much going on it fell to the back of my mind and there was no way I could even pass.
“I emailed your professors explaining the situation that a family member was gravelly ill,” She pushed a cup of coffee toward me and I gladly accepted, “You have time to re-take the quizzes and a paper you missed, but the finals still stand.”
I swallowed, “I don’t even want to know what grades I have,” I muttered, accidentally out loud.
“You’re not doing so well,” She gave me a slightly sympathetic smile and a shrug, “But if you don’t do too bad on your finals then you might just make it.”
“You’re really selling it,” I smiled at her, “Fine, what do I have to do.”
Cali grinned and leaned forward, running me through it all.
___
Caspien came in with Emmett and Loreli later on, they brought us doughnuts from Goddess knew where.
“I’m taking our parents to the game tonight, I skipped out on my promise last time,” Caspien frowned.
“I think being on your deathbed is a warranted excuse,” I tried to smile but chills ran through me at the words.
“Either way, we’re all going, get out of your way for a bit.” Caspien placed a kiss on my forehead.
I was begging for any distraction from the meaningless words swimming in front of me. I went through my chemistry this morning and was able to work through most of it before even re-watching the cla*s*ses I missed.
These terms and phrases and LIFO vs FIFO were getting to me. Maybe I didn’t see the merit of it, but I knew that wasn’t true. It made more sense for me to understand business than chemistry as a Luna.
“I’ll bring you back a hot dog,” Emmett promised bouncing up and down next to me.
“Thanks, honey. Have a good time.” I ruffled his hair and he grabbed Loreli’s hand and dragged her behind Emmett.
I sighed slumping back in my chair and staring longingly after them.
“Those terms aren’t going to memorize themselves.” Cali gave me a playful smile but it promised death if I didn’t get back to my flashcards.
I shot her a glare and flipped my page noisily.
“Isn’t this nice?” Cali said looking around ignoring me, “It’s like the good old days. But instead of us cramming at your rickety dining room table were in a penthouse looking down at where we used to live.”
“It is, but still weird,” I admitted thinking of how completely our lives changed.
“Weird for you?” Cali crossed her arms, “I found out that humans can turn into giant wolfs, and that I was destined to be with one of them.” She snorted.
“This isn’t a weird competition,” I shot back smiling, “But you’re right, your life has completely changed. Completely.” I couldn’t even imagine.
“It has,” Her smile widened as she twisted the ring on her finger, “It is everything I didn’t dare to even dream of, and it happened.” Her voice was soft, wistful and it made me happy.
“Beer?” I asked, one of our study beverages when the coffee was hitting too hard.
“Celebratory beer?” She asked, flipping her long curls over her shoulder, “Always.”
She popped up from her chair and went into the kitchen behind her to grab some beer from the fridge. I wondered when Caspien started stocking it, it didn’t seem like his drink, and I didn’t remember seeing it in there when I first started coming over.
“I asked him,” Cai said setting down our favorite cheap beer in front of me, “To stock this,” She added giving me a smile answering my unspoken question, “He’s not so bad you know.”
“You’re right. You really sold him.” I met her wry smile.
“Cheers,” I tapped my beer to hers, “We did it.”
“Some of it,” I amended, scowling at my notes.
“This is worse than I remember,” Cali frowned at her beer, “I love it.”
“Reminds me of a simpler time,” I joked, but even back then nothing was simple.
Caspien came into my life and he turned it upside down. He showed me how a mate, a partner, and an equal should act and he let me fall in love with him in a way that felt comfortable for me. If he would have been anyone else, I don’t know if I would have accepted a second chance, especially if they tried to push me like Nolan often did. I was lucky that it was him.
“Nothing in my life has been as easy as it is now,” Cali’s voice dropped, “I’m thankful that Holden and his family, your family, and even Caspien’s stepped in.” I swallowed.
“I’m happy that I have you, I’m d.amn lucky that I met you,” Cali said her fiery stare met mine but I could see it misting over, “I don’t know what I would have done without you.” She shook her head blinking.
That floored me, I didn’t know what I would have done without her. My dark firecracker fairy godmother that helped me find a job, took care of Emmett and pulled me back from myself when I was internalizing.
“You saved me,” I whispered.
“That is not the truth. You saved yourself.” Cali said, her voice hard now, “I might have been there but just as a witness.” She gave me her signature smile.
“Okay, fine, but you helped me more than you could have known.” I amended.
“So did you.” She nodded towards me lifting her beer, “To family.”
“To family.” I raised mine.
___
I felt like I was actually in college, cramming for days. Everything blended together, my eyes felt hot and stung at some points when I opened a page. I wrote and re-wrote the same essay, and even though I got sleep I still felt overwhelmed.
It was kind of nice.
Stressed over something that wasn’t life and death for once.
It felt almost normal.
“Ready?” Caspien held his hand out to me, and I scooped my notes into a purse.
“Sure,” I placed my hand in his and he helped me stand.
I ran my fingers through my hair. Why was I so nervous? Did it even matter?
But it did. To me, it did. I wanted to finish this, the first thing I might have started myself for myself.
I wouldn’t condemn myself if I failed, in the grand scheme of things it didn’t matter, it wouldn’t change the course of things that I had set in motion. But I was nervous. It did matter to me. I had to prove to myself that I could.
“Good luck, but you don’t need it.” Caspien raised my hand to his lips and kissed it before sliding out of the car and opening the door for me, “I’ll be here when you’re done.”
“Thanks.”
I took a long look at him. Unwavering confidence, as always. He was fixing the sleeve of his Immaculate suit, looking picture-perfect, but I no longer wondered if I could match up to that.
He was mine, and I was his, and we balanced each other, completed each other perfectly.
I turned away with a glimmer of confidence, and I hoped it was all I needed to help me get through these finals.
____
Cali stood by the computer, refreshing our grades, I knew she wasn’t as worried for herself. She excelled at her courses and was keeping up with them. I appreciated her anxiety for me, at least.
I needed 72% on my final to pass this cla*s*s. The others I passed. If barely. But the business one was my hardest, for me at least.
“Oh my gosh!” Cali jumped up and grabbed her face.
“What?” I couldn’t contain my shock and excitement.
“You got a seventy-three.” She jumped up, and I joined her, I grabbed her arms.
“Holy c.rap did I pass?” My voice was high-pitched, and we danced around the kitchen before bumping into the island and falling over it laughing.
“I don’t have to ask that you passed, right?” I looked at her.
“I got it of course I did,” She flipped her hair over her shoulder but fixed me with a smile.
“I never doubted you,” I said. She raised an eyebrow, “No, really, not with this, at least.”
“B*itc*h,” She slapped my arm before leaning over the counter.
“So now what?” We conquered summer cla*s*ses at community college; where are we going next?”
Cali sat up, “The world is our oyster.” Her eyes gleamed, and in some way, it was.