Fated To the Alpha by Jessica Hall
Chapter 276: Kyan POV
I watched as Ella fell asleep. Placing my hand on her head, her temperature had gone down, and her scent was beginning to dissipate. “She is fine, Kyan,” Jonah murmured behind me.
“You weren’t wearing protection,” I mumbled, looking down at her.
“Point being, she would have said something if she was worried,” Jonah shrugs.
“She may not be worried, but my DNA is in your veins. If you knocked her up, it would be mine too!” I tell him.
“Ah, am I missing something? We are mates, maybe not like Mateo and Ezra, but still, mates. We have marked each other. Isn’t that the point?” Jonah asked, and I sighed. He wasn’t getting it.
“The curse Jonah, if you knocked her up and she has a baby,”
“If she has a baby! Mara may not even want kids, first of all, and secondly, I don’t think you have to worry about Kaif k*g her, and as for the darkness, Kaif has marked her already. It has no effect on her,” Jonah says.
“I am worried about the curse continuing,” I tell him. Jonah growls, and I could feel his frustration through the bond.
“Kyan, this curse has no effect on her. She has proven that!”
“May not affect her but affects Kaif and any children we have,”
“You are worried Kaif will still k**l her? After everything, seriously, Kyan?” Jonah asks.
“I don’t know,” I answer honestly. I didn’t know. Everything I a*s*sumed was wrong. However, something had changed with Kaif; I felt at peace, and so did he since she marked him. Like the world’s weight lifted off of him. She accepted him, not just me.
She accepted Kaif, and I feel that was what was needed all along. However, if time was any indicator, it was consistently repeated.
“You are. You’re worried if she got pregnant, Kaif would k**l her?” I nod, looking down at her.
“Not this time. Ella is different,” Kaif said, dismissing the idea instantly.
“She isn’t just your mate, Kyan. I am yours too, and hers. If you don’t trust yourself or Kaif. Trust that I won’t let harm come to her, but I know Kaif won’t hurt her,” Jonah says, gripping my shoulder.
“How?”
“Because I felt it when she marked him,” he says. “Mara set him free when she marked him and he her. Mara was right. Kaif didn’t need redemption. He needed acceptance, destined to live the same fate over. Rejection, Kyan. It was never redemption. It was them turning against him.
They turned away from him like Luna did. Mara turned to him,” Jonah says, and I nod. I hoped he was right. But something had been nagging me. Kaif was hiding something, and it was making me uneasy.
I know he had control earlier, blocked me out, and refused to tell me what he and Ella spoke about.
“You can trust me, Kyan,” Kaif tells me. But why was it a secret? It had me worried that something more was going on, I just didn’t know why Kaif would keep it from me, and despite having marked and mated, I was waiting for the world to come crashing down around me. It always did. Shaking the thought away, I headed for the bathroom to shower.
“I must say I like the extra showerheads,” Jonah says, stepping in behind me.
“Jonah!” I tell him.
“Dude, we were just sword crossing. Get over it,” he says, turning the other showerhead on. I grab the soap, moving over for him.
“Don’t say it like that. You make it sound d***y,” I snap at him.
“Fine, we were rubbing d*ic*ks then,” Jonah laughs.
“And that sounds even worse. Just stop!” I growl, and Jonah laughs.
“I would have thought you would have taken a disinfectant bath,” Jonah says, snatching the soap from my hand.
“I told you s*e*x is different,” I tell him.
“I didn’t say it was a bad thing. I was trying to understand it,” Jonah says.
“Well, I don’t even understand it,” I admit.
“Well, try to explain it,” he says while dropping the soap in my hand and turning to face me while he rinsed the soap off.
“Doesn’t that hurt?” I asked, glancing at his d**k. I still can’t believe he made me go with him when he got that done.
“You know it didn’t hurt. You were there, and stop looking at my d**k,”
“No, I mean, I don’t want to know,” I tell him, shaking my head.
“Curiosity k***d the cat Kyan, I’ll answer, but you can have to explain about the s*e*x thing,” he says. I nod. We had always been pretty open when it came to talking, not that we had any secrets from each other. It seemed pointless when he was my guardian and could feel everything I felt. Now that was just stronger with the mate bond.
“And no, it doesn’t hurt. They move under my skin, not pull, the bars roll with movement. Why did it hurt you?” he asked. I shake my head. Mara seemed to like his piercings, and so did he, so I supposed I could live with him having them.
“No, just like a rolling sensation,” I admit pointing to the shampoo behind Jonah. He passes it to me.
“Your turn,” Jonah says.
“I wasn’t lying when I said I didn’t understand it myself,” I tell him.
“Yeah, I know. I am just curious what you think about it,”
“I’m not sure. Think it is more to do with sensation than anything.”
“What’s the difference?” Jonah asks, and I think.
“It’s expected to be messy?”‘ I shrug. I try to find a way to explain.
“Like the labels, I can see they aren’t straight, like a compulsion thing. I can control it. I like order, so I straighten them.”
“s*e*x you can’t control?” Jonah asks.
“No, I can, but as I said, the sensation overpowers the mindset, if that makes sense, maybe because I don’t want control over it,” I try to explain. We had this discussion plenty of times over the years, but it was hard to explain, let alone why some things trigger certain compulsions.
“Mum is the same with locks. Drives dad up the wall,” Jonah laughs.
“Spose it is the same, though. I asked ma that once,” I tell him.
“What she say?” he asked.
“It’s the same with me. She gets up and checks them because she can’t sleep. If she hasn’t, it will play on her mind until she does,”
“Yes, but she does it repeatedly,” Jonah says.
“Yes, I can be the same. I get it, though. Your mind tricks you. Repet*ition is predictable. Your mother checks the locks, she lays down but then wonders did she really check the lock or was that yesterday, so she checks again.
And sometimes again, I do the same sometimes. It can be consuming and annoying, but I am not at ease until I have convinced myself it is correct. Even if she knows she checked it, that slight doubt makes her recheck it. Does that make sense?” I tell him.
“Kind of,”
“Maybe because you don’t suffer from anxiety as much,” I tell him.
“Much? I don’t have anxiety.” he says and I raise an eyebrow at him.
“Ah yeah, you do. When Kaif moves forward, you do. You go into fight-or-flight mode. You also do when it comes to Mara.”
“What do you mean?” he asks.
“I mean, you keep thinking you’re the third wheel,” I tell him. He sighs and nods.
“You’re not. You are the one person that was constant in both our lives, the glue you kept us all together,” I tell him.
“But no donutting,” Jonah laughs.
“Definitely not donutting,” I tell him, turning the shower off. I grab a towel, tossing him one before walking back into the room. Marabella was still asleep, and I retrieved some shorts before climbing in bed beside her, and Jonah climbed over both of us to lie on her other side.
“Mara is hiding something, and so is Kaif,” I tell Jonah.
“And Eziah, he was weird when I saw him at the apartment,’ Jonah says.
“But I trust Mara, so let her, if she is hiding something from us. She would have a good reason, too,” Jonah adds. I say nothing because whatever it was, Kaif also wanted it kept from me, yet it kept nagging me. Jonah is right though curiosity k****d the cat, so I had to trust whatever it was, that she would come to me over it or trust Kaif would step in if something went wrong.
“It is nothing bad, Kyan. Just let her do this,” Kaif tells me.
“So you know what she is up to?” I ask him.
“Yes, and she is right to keep it from you, so leave it be for now. Everything goes fine, and you will know. If not, you are none the wiser.” he answers.
“As long as she isn’t putting herself in danger?”
“I wouldn’t allow that, Kyan, and neither would Eziah, ” Kaif answers. With a sigh I roll over, I chuck my arm over Marabella at the same time Jonah does, both of us snuggling closer to our mate. “Trust the bond, she won’t jeopardize it,” Kaif tells me as I drift off.